


Not Your Fault

by Sivan325, SivanShemesh (Sivan325)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Alec Lightwood Angst, Angst, Bad Parent Maryse Lightwood, Bad Parent Robert Lightwood, Broken Parabatai Bond, Chapters number may change, Clones, Doubt, Emotional Hurt, Good Parabatai Jace Wayland, Grief/Mourning, Guilt, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Injured Alec Lightwood, Kidnapped Alec Lightwood, M/M, Max Lightwood Dies, Minor Canonical Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Out of Character, Parabatai, Parabatai Bond, Parabatai Feels, Presumed Dead, The Author Regrets Nothing, Time Skips, Torture, Valentine morgenstern's experiments, alternative universe, just in case
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2020-10-21
Packaged: 2020-11-08 06:20:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,821
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20830793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sivan325/pseuds/Sivan325, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sivan325/pseuds/SivanShemesh
Summary: “I want you three to stay here. Isabelle, look after Max. Sebastian, finish securing the house.” (City of Glass, page 221).Max is dead because of him; he knew it and everyone else knew it.No wonder everyone is blaming him, he doesn’t need to hear their words, he can see how they are looking at him, and that is enough to tear him apart.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Author Note: I kind of mixed both book 3 and the Shadowhunters tv series.

**New York**

His little brother is dead because of him, if only he had been there with them, Max would have been alive right now.

He needs to be alone, away from his parents and his siblings, his lover probably has something else or another client.

Alec wandered around, trying to find some peace in his heart, but all he remembered was Max with Sebastian, Max was alive.

The Nephilim walked about for hours, and he knew that he couldn’t be anywhere else, but then he heard a sound that came from his phone, and he noticed the text, but instead of checking what the text was, Alec shut off the phone, and after giving it another thought, he dropped it on the ground and kept walking.

\--

While at Magnus loft, Isabelle was trying to reach her brother on the phone, but without any success, Jace was trying to locate him using the parabatai rune at the same time, but Alec kept blocking him.

“Magnus, there’s something wrong, I can’t reach Alec,” Isabelle said, and Jace added, “He is blocking me, and the parabatai rune tracking isn’t working either.”

“What happened to him that caused him to walk away?” Magnus asked as he walked toward the bedroom and took one of Alec’s shirts.

“Sebastian killed Max and hurt me as well, while Alec went to help Aline,” Izzy explained and then added, “He told us to stay there while Sebastian secured the house.”

“I could feel that there was something wrong in our bond, but he shut me out.” Jace said.

“Did anyone tell him that it was not his fault?” Magnus asked them.

Magnus tried to track Alexander, but without success, the warlock figures that he might be near water.

“I can’t track him; he is probably near the water or something.” Magnus said, trying to figure what to do next.

“What can we do?” Izzy asked, worried about her brother current state.

“Did your parents tell Alec something that made him go off like that?” Magnus asked.

Izzy looked at Jace, and then she answered, “We were not there when they came in, I was in the armory and Jace was with Clary.”

“So, none of you knew that Robert and Maryse came…” Magnus murmured, and before he could add more, the door was opened, and Luke came in with Clary and Simon.

“Who knew that they be there in the institute?” Magnus asked.

“Probably Lydia Branwell, she told me that Robert and Maryse were there, and that she can’t find Alec. One second he was there, and then he was gone.”

“What are you doing here?” Luke asked and then he noticed the worried faces, “What’s wrong?”

“Alexander is missing, no one has seen him after Max’s death, and he wasn’t at the funeral.” Magnus concluded.

“I’ll send my pack to track him,” Luke said, while Simon called Raphael at the same time to ask him to do the same.

“Where is his phone?” Clary asked.

“He wasn’t answering when I tried it.” Izzy replied, not knowing what else to do.

At this point a ringtone broke the silence in the room.

Jace looked at the screen and told them, “It is Maryse, how should I answer it?”

“Tell her the truth, they might know what happens.” Magnus gave his two cents.

“Hey Maryse…” Jace said.

_“Did you see Alec? I can’t find him, he doesn’t answer his phone, is he with his boyfriend?”_

“He isn’t with Magnus, I’m at his place with and Izzy.” Jace replied, and then decide to ask, “Mom, what happened between you and Alec?”

_“We might have done more harm than we thought when we talked with him…” Maryse sighed heavily._

“What did you say to him?” Jace asked.

_“Well… it is none of your business; we need to talk with him ourselves. Where is he?”_

“No one knows, it’s like he vanished from the face of the earth.” Jace replied, concerned about his older brother.

_“What do you mean no one knows? Not even his boyfriend?” _

“No one.” Jace replied.

_“I’m coming over, send me the address of the warlock.”_

Jace hung up his phone and texted her the address.

“Maryse will be here soon, and she doesn’t want to share with me what happened between them and Alec.” Jace sighed.

“Come with me Simon, maybe we can find him together, evil still lurks outside.” Luke urged the vampire as they left Magnus’s loft.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note: I kind of mixed both book 3 and the Shadowhunters tv series.
> 
> Disclaimer: the fabulous work belongs to Cassandra Clair, thank you for creating the Shadow world.

Alec couldn’t bear to attend the funeral, it was bad enough for him to feel how both strangers and his family looked at him like he did something wrong, and what was even worse as far as he was concerned was that in a way, he felt he did.  
It was his fault that Sebastian killed his brother and hurt his sister, he had a feeling that if he was there with them, maybe Max would still be alive, and no harm would have come to Izzy.

Alec left the institute and, putting a glamour on himself. was wandering near the river in a state of depression. The shadowhunter felt he couldn’t be near his boyfriend right now, that maybe his parents were right to scorn him and maybe the warlock will feel the same.

His father couldn’t even bear to look at him while his mother spoke, he didn’t need to hear their condemnations to know it was his fault, his and his alone.

Alec didn’t want anyone to know where he was. he moved his stele at his neck area, drawing the deflect rune so someone couldn’t trace where he was, at the same time he blocked his emotional connection with his parabatai, to prevent him knowing how he was feeling, he didn’t want anyone intruding on him, he wanted to be alone with his thoughts.

He forgot that he had his phone with him until he heard the ringtone that Max put on his phone. At first, he decided to just turn off the phone, but after a second thought, decided he didn’t need the phone at all, so he dumped it on the road as he continued walking.

Alec was angry, not only at himself but at Sebastian as well, he was to blame for the current situation.

\--

Maryse opened the door and Robert walked behind in her, as she looked at the downworlder, her daughter and adopted son, she also noticed Clary was in the apartment with them.

“Where’s your brother?”

“We don’t know,” Jace replied and then asked, “What did you tell him?”

“Lydia found his gear in his room, he only has his bow and arrows, and Valentine is still out there.” Was what Robert said in reply, not answering the question.

“What did you tell him that he left all his gear behind and is not responding to any of us?” Izzy asked, worried about her brother.

“I came to tell to him that I shouldn’t have told him that his boyfriend couldn’t even bear to look at him, and his siblings couldn’t stand him either,” Maryse replied, and then added, “we told him it was his fault that Max was dead, and that he has no worth if he can’t even protect his siblings.”

\--

“Well, what do we have here?” Alec heard a voice snap at him.

Caught by surprise, Alec looked up to see Sabastian, the bane of his existence, glaring at him.

Alec hands went for his dagger and the Seraph blade, but they weren’t there. How could he be so stupid to leave them back at the institute, but at least he had his arrows, and fortunately, he had his bow as well.

“Lightwood, what are doing out here all by yourself? Do you want to join your brother?” Sebastian taunted him as he closed the distance between them.

“Get away from me!” Alec retorted, pulling an arrow from the quiver and drawing his bow.

“Why? So, you could shoot me? You think you could actually shoot me?”

“You learned nothing boy, I am stronger than you…” Sebastian snickered at him and with one blurred motion of his hand, sent the bow crashing to the ground, shattering it to pieces in the process.

“What are you going to do now?” Sebastian mocked him then turned to look at the man behind him.

“Take him, obviously he is not the strongest one in the bunch, but we could use him as our pawn in the game.” Valentine replied, with an evil grin as he looked at Alec.

Alec knew that he brought his current predicament on himself, even his parents knew how worthless he was, and he just proved their point.


	3. Chapter 3

“This can’t be good.” Simon said when he and Luke saw the phone that was laying on the ground.

Alec’s phone screen was crushed but the phone was still working even though they found it turned off.

“Let them know that we have his phone.” Luke suggested.

Simon waited for the phone to power up and saw the messages filling the screen with Izzy’s name on them and he figured he’d send her a message, even though its from Alec’s phone, _“We found his phone, but no Alec.”_

A few minutes later, Luke was the one to find the next clue something was not right. “There’s something wrong here, I can smell Valentine and Sebastian, and some of Alec, but there’s something awfully wrong.”

There was a tiny cracking sound. As Luke turned around, he noticed the splintered remains of Alec’s bow and the broken arrows beside them.

“What do you mean?” Simon asked as he kept messaging Izzy.

“They took Alec, and I think that he was hurt, there’s a bit of blood on the ground, but it looks like it was planted, I believe that they are planning something, we should head back to Magnus.”

“Wait, I will send Magnus a message from Alec’s phone, he can portal us to his loft.” Simon said and didn’t waste any time sending the message.

In less than a minute, a portal opened next to them and they went through it, carrying Alec’s things with them.

\--

Alec woke up slowly, he didn’t know where he was, and it took him awhile to notice the dim light, and the pain, the pain was almost too much for him.

“Don’t worry, weakest one, your parabatai can’t feel your pain, we kind of took care of that rune, so you’re dead to him,” Valentine smirked at him and added, “Beside, look at it in this way, the world be better without you, after all it was your fault that your little brother is dead, isn’t it?”

“So, what can we do to him then?” Sebastian asked.

Valentine smiled as walked and came closer to the shadowhunter, “I told you he was weak, his siblings are much stronger than him, we should have taken them, not this one.”

Alec kept looking at them after he looked over himself, one of them obviously bandaged his arm after they wounded him, Alec remembered Sebastian scratching him with his own arrow.

He also noticed the parabatai rune was gone from his body. He didn’t know how his siblings would feel about it, and then he remembered his warlock, Alec didn’t know what Magnus would do, if he would act to repay the ones who killed him or he might move on with his life.

“This is all we have, so keep playing, but keep him alive, we need to lure the strongest one here to trade whatever’s left for that one.”

“I will try, he looks so innocent, how could this warlock love him knowing that it was his fault that Max is dead?” Sebastian sneered at him, as he moved his stele to draw the agony rune over and over, and Alec suffered and had to re-live it’s effects.

“No one will forgive you for what you did, you’re supposed to be the one who takes care of your little brother, but you failed.”

Alec cried, he knew that Sebastian was right, it was entirely his fault, and now he was being punished for it as he should have been.

\--

Jace couldn’t feel any pain, but what shocked him was that he couldn’t feel Alec at all, he moved his shirt, only to notice that his parabatai rune was gone.

“There’s something wrong,” Jace worryingly said, as he added, “the parabatai rune is gone, but I didn’t feel any pain, does that mean that he is dead?”

“It could be,” Robert said and looked at his wife, “What can we do about the institute?”

“Isabelle, you with me, come along young lady, we have no time to waste, we need to get ready for what Valentine will offer to exchange for Alec’s dead body.” Maryse told to her daughter.

The portal opened, and Luke and Simon came through, bearing what was left from Alec’s things.

“There was bit of blood, it was from Alec.” Luke said.

Simon placed Alec’ phone, and the broken bow and arrows near to it.

Simon noticed the worried glances and tears, and asked, “What did we miss?”

“Alexander is dead, so it seems.” Magnus replied, not knowing if that was really happening to him.

The boy that he loved, was dead.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author Note: I kind of mixed both book 3 and the Shadowhunters tv series.

Isabelle picked up the broken bow and arrows and cried, “No, it can’t be…”

“Alec wouldn’t let anyone break his favorite weapon,” Magnus said as he gathered Izzy in his arms, and then he tried to fix the broken items with his magic, to no avail. “Is he really dead?”

“I can fix it; I can fix his weapons.” Izzy cries.

“What for Izzy? Alec is dead!” Maryse told her, and looked at Jace and asked, “Can you feel him? Anything?”

“No, and that is strange, I suppose that Valentine did something to him.” Jace said.

“Well, I suppose that we have better things to do then stand here. Alec is dead, and maybe he should be stay dead, look how easily he was caught, and Alec was supposed to be one of the best shadowhunters, what a joke!”

“He is your son!” Clary told her angrily.

“This is none of your concern Clary Fairchild, mind your own business.” Maryse sneered at her.

“This is not your fight, Biscuit.” Magnus tried comforts her after Maryse dismissing remark.

“What should we do? Do you really think Alec is dead?” Clary asked, looking at Jace even as she asked Magnus the question.

“Well, after living all these centuries, I came to only have one conclusion in this sort of case.” Magnus replied.

“And what is that, Warlock?” Robert asked.

“No body, no murder.” Magnus replied with a sad smile.

“Do not give up on your son!” Clary said to Robert and Maryse as she went to stand with Jace.

Jace embraced his girlfriend, he knew that she was right, his adopted parents seemed to have already given up on his brother, there is no telling what they might do.

“Well, as touching as this meeting has been, please leave my loft, Lightwoods.” Magnus clicked his fingers and the door was opened with a flash of blue magic.

After the Lightwood family and Clary left Magnus’s loft. Magnus sighed heavily and he turned around and saw Simon and Luke still there.

“What now?” Magnus asked.

“You didn’t ask us to leave.” Simon pointed to him.

“You could go after Clary Sherman.” Magnus taunted him.

“It’s Simon.”

Luke chuckled, and then he asked, “Is there anything that my pack can do?”

After a moment, Magnus replied, “Yes, there is, hunt Sebastian, he hurt Alec’s family.”

“Luke, maybe if we hunt for Sebastian, we can also find Valentine perhaps?” Simon suggested.

“See, I know that you can be useful, Simor.” Magnus smiled at him.

“Magnus, my name is Simon.” Simon tried again, hopefully eventually the warlock will get his name right.

\--

**Outside Magnus’s loft**

“I’m going to hunt some demons; I can’t go back to the institute right now.” Jace said and left.

“Jace wait, I’m coming with you.” Clary cried as she hurried after him.

Izzy looked after them as they ran off, and she was left alone with her parents, she lost the fight.

“Come along Isabelle, in the morning you’ll take the leadership of the institute, and we have no time to spare, we don’t even know what game Valentine is playing.” Robert told his daughter while Maryse just looked on.

\--

_Somewhere…_

“That’s enough my son.” Valentine said.

Sebastian smiled as he noticed the pale skin color of the defeated shadowhunter, he knew that he did a good work in breaking him.

“You did very well, now all we have to do is to wait a maximum of three days to let the parabatai rune return, and then I have a great plans for this sacrificial lamb of ours.” Valentine said with a sneering smile.

“What are you planning to do?” Sebastian asked.

“You’ll see.”

\--

** _Three days later…_ **

**The New York Institute**

While Jace and clary were sparring, Izzy came to talk to them.

“I can’t believe that your parents wouldn’t search for Alec.” Clary said to Izzy.

“I heard that Maryse told Imogen that Alec died in battle, if this was true, then where is his body, I miss my parabatai.” Jace added.

“What should we do about it then? It has been three days, and there have been no demands from Valentine and who knows where Sebastian is.” Isabelle worriedly said.

“We can continue patrolling, maybe we will find Alec.” Jace suggested.

“I miss him.” Izzy said.

Suddenly, Jace dropped his weapon, and Clary noticed that his parabatai rune was back.

“Jace, the rune is back,” Clary said and hurried to his side as he sat down on the floor, his eyes closed, “Jace, are you okay?”

“So much pain, he is alive, but… I can’t reach him; he is at the end of his rope.” Jace slammed his hand on the floor.

“He is alive, that’s good news, but where is he?” Izzy asked, and texted Magnus.

“Maybe Magnus can track him.” Jace suggested.

“Let’s go to him, maybe he will have some suggestions. I can open a portal.” Clary reminded them.

“Come on Izzy, it’s not like we have to hunt demons right now” Jace told to his sister. “but since Maryse and Robert are running the institute and they let Lydia do their dirty work for them, so we better leave now, and get this taken care of before they notice we are gone.”.

Clary opened a portal, and the three passed to the other side. And came out a couple of blocks from Magnus’s loft.

“I need to work on my navigation.” Clary smiled.

“You’ll get there eventually; I know you will.” Jace embraced her, and then he moved his hand to touch the rune.

“What is it?” Isabelle asked.

“I can hear Alec’s thoughts, he is telling himself in a loop how guilty he is for Max’s death, and whatever I want to say to him, falls on deaf ears, it’s like he is not even listening to me, or he is in a trance.” Jace murmured.

“The agony rune, he must have been suffering and alone, we’ve got to find him soon, maybe Magnus have some luck with it.” Izzy said as the three ran toward Magnus’s loft.

At Magnus’s loft, the warlock sighed heavily as he saw the rune.

“How is Alexander?” Magnus asked as they sat on the couch.

“Not good, and we can’t track him,” Jace replied and then he added, “The agony rune might have been used on him, and I can hear his thoughts, and the broken words in his mind, it seemed that he believed what everyone was saying to him, how worthless and weak he is, and how he want to reverse what had happened or die instead of Max, he believes that everything that happened was his fault, and I… I can’t reach him.”

“I’ll try to track him, let’s hope he is not near the water.” Magnus said and picked up Alec’s shirt to use his location magic.

Magnus sighed heavily, “There’s no use, he is near water.”

Izzy asked, “Do you think that we will know what Valentine demands are soon?”

“If he had any, he should have let us know three days ago. And besides, Valentine might want me to join him as the heir or something.” Clary replied.

\--

** _At the same time… in Valentine’s ship_ **

The parabatai rune returned, Alec was as pale as the moon, and he was losing weight as Sebastian and Valentine didn’t bother to give him something to eat, they just used runes at him.

“Look what I have for you shadowhunter, do you think that they will know it’s you?” Valentine sneered at him.

He placed Alec on the strange device and smiled as he noticed the pain that Alec was being in, but the young man was strong enough not to scream, and then he slumped as the device really started to do it’s horrid work.

“Let’s the fun begin.”

\--

** _Few minutes later, at Magnus’s loft_ **

The alarms on the shadowhunters phone rang, and in the screen shows, “Alec Lightwood is alive and was recovered!”

“It can’t be… I mean, why would Valentine release him in the first place?” Jace asked, throbbing his parabatai rune, it was giving an odd mix of both pain and happiness, something was odd to him, but he was happy that Alec was alive.

“You can bring him tomorrow, I would love to take care of my boyfriend, go be with him, I’ll open the portal.”

Magnus opened the portal and saw the shadowhunters through it, he hoped to see his boyfriend soon, he missed him so much it hurt.

\--

In the institute, they were told that Alec was in the infirmary.

“How is he?”

“Distanced, hurt, and he lost weight, but he looked happy to be back.” The medic told them.

“Can I be with my parabatai?” Jace asked.

“You can, the others should wait a bit.”

Jace entered the room and smiled as he saw his parabatai and walked to sit next him.

“My parabatai, I missed you.” Jace told him

Alec eyes looked at him and then he looked at the other side.

Something was odd, but he will not let his brother fade and disappear from them now that they had him back.

“Alec, what happened to you?” Jace asked.

“It doesn’t matter, I’m here now.” Alec replied not facing his parabatai.

“Good, I need my parabatai back, we missed you brother.” Jace told him, and hoped for the best, maybe some food and rest will help with the distance, or maybe Izzy could cheer him up.

\--

** _At Valentine’s ship_ **

“See, it wasn’t that bad,” Valentine chuckled and looked at the slumped shadowhunter and added, “Besides, do you think that they will remember you or even know that you are here while the new version of you is back at the institute?”


	5. Chapter 5

**New York Institute**

Jace sighed in relief as he saw his brother coming back to resemble his old self, and he didn’t want to push Alec to tell him what Valentine did to him, so he gave him space.

He missed a lot of things from his brother; his laugh, their fights together, his majestic attitude, and he was glad that Alec is getting better, but first he knew that he should tell him what all of them should have told him after Max’s death.

“Alec, it’s good to see that you are getting better, parabatai, I missed you, and brother, there’s something that I need to tell you,” Jace said and noticed that Isabelle joined them in the room, “What happened to Max was not your fault.”

Alec just stared at them, not bothering to say a word.

“I’m glad to see that you are feeling better, and your boyfriend missed you, by the way.” Jace told him.

Isabelle left the room to let Simon and Luke know that they should stop the search.

* * *

_While on Valentine’s ship_

“Well, what will we do with him?” Sebastian asked.

“Keep him, if something happens to the clone, we can always make another one.” Valentine smiled and kicked Alexander off the device.

Alexander was in bad shape, hungry, lost, and basically, he lost any hope that someone will try to find _him_ and did not spare a thought to whatever Valentine did with that device.

“I think that you should go back to the institute my son,” Valentine suggested and then he added, “I can’t wait to see how the experiment goes, and I need it recorded, the shadowhunter should see with his own eyes, what he is missing, and maybe everyone can be convinced that this new version is better than the original one…” Valentine chuckled.

“I better go then.” Sebastian said and left.

“Well, weak shadowhunter, your worst nightmare has just begun.” Valentine snickered at him as he kicked the shadowhunter in the ribs, he enjoyed hearing the bones breaking one after another, as the man breathing took on a labored tone, gasping for air.

* * *

**NYI**

Magnus left the portal as he headed to the infirmary, he had to see with his own eyes.

His Alexander was alive, he needed to touch him, to know it was not an illusion.

Alec smiled as he entered the room, and that lit Magnus’s heart.

“Alexander, how good to see your smile, are your siblings taking care of you?”

“Yes, they are.” Alec replied.

“Good, are you feeling all right? I can’t wait for you to join me, I missed you Alexander.” Magnus kissed his boyfriend, and was prepared to create a portal, when Jace cried out in pain.

“Is there something wrong, Jace?” Magnus asked Jace as his hand clutched his boyfriend’s hand.

“I don’t know, and it’s driving me crazy, I mean, Alec is here with us smiling, and yet, I can feel pain in my ribs, broken, and then the hunger, you think that maybe Alec just need food?”

“He might, we can test it in the loft.” Magnus replied, and created a portal, motioning to Alec to step through and then for Jace.

“Fine by me,” Jace said, still feeling uneasy, and then he turned around to ask his sister, “Are you coming?”

“I better stay here, in case mom and dad want to ask any questions, but keep me updated.” Isabelle said.

Jace winked at her and passed through the portal with Magnus following him, and the portal closed behind them.

* * *

**At Magnus’s loft**

Magnus watched his boyfriend with worried eyes, as he asked, “Are you sure you are okay Alexander?”

Alec nodded as he sat on the couch.

Magnus moved his hand, and as if by magic, a table with white cloth on it appeared, and then the table was covered with food, some dishes that Jace knew, and some that were new.

Alec looked not at all surprised, but just stared blankly at nowhere.

“Alexander, are you alright?” Magnus asked as he caress Alec’s cheek with his hand.

“Y… Yes, just tired, I suppose.”

“Eat something first, and then go to sleep in our room.” Magnus motioned him toward the table.

Alec sat in the middle, as the warlock and the other man sat beside him.

With shaking hands, Alec puts several portions on his plate, and then he tasted some of them.

“Bon Appetite everyone.” Magnus smiled and took some of the food himself as he watched his boyfriend eating.

A few minutes later, Alec looked sated, and quite ready to bed.

“How are you feeling Jace?” Magnus asked, noticing how tight the blonde man’s hands were wound about his chest.

“Still hurts?” Magnus asked in wonder, while on his side Alec was smiling like nothing was wrong with him.

“Yes, and it’s killing me not knowing what the reason for this is.” Jace tried to understand what was going on with the parabatai rune.

“That bad, I’m sure it just a side effect of what happened to your brother, it might pass by morning.” Magnus told him.

“I think that there’s something wrong with the parabatai rune, I mean, look at Alec, he is fine, and yet, my ribs are killing me, like they are broken, and it’s hurt to breath.”

Before Magnus could add his piece, Simon entered the loft, “I’ve heard that he’s here, so I had to see with my own eyes.”

Simon looked at Alec, noticed the tall man staring at him, and yet not say another word, “Well, I suppose that the rumors are true, and I see that your brother is still charming.”

“Only toward my boyfriend.” Alec told him as he kissed the warlock.

Sebastian posed as Izzy entered the loft, he clicked on the camera and caught the moment.

“Oh Isabelle, I didn’t know that you’ll come.” Simon smiled at her and kissed her.

When the kissed broke, Sebastian told him in Izzy’s voice, “Well, I want to show my parents that everything is back to normal and they should not give a damn about Alec’s love life.”

Isabelle opened the camera again and set it to Video mode and started to record the moment – Magnus kissed Alec and told him that he feared for him, and Alec is the best thing that happened to him and that he loves him.

“That’s good stuff, but I think that you should head to your bedroom, and I’ve got to go, I’ll come back here later.” said Isabelle and then left, leaving a confused Simon behind.

* * *

On Valentine’s Ship, Valentine moved the stele on the healing rune and then on the agony, not letting the shadowhunter moment to rest. he wasn’t done playing with him just yet. And then Sebastian came in.

“It’s about time you came back son,” Valentine smiled at him, and added, gesturing at the groaning Alec, “I got bored.”

“I have it all and imagine the records that I took for this weak shadowhunter that we have here.” Sebastian mocked Alec as he set up the video.

Alec could see in the video, his brother was in the background, smiling, and a version of him kissing Magnus, and his boyfriend told him that he loved him, his clone.

Alec believed that his other half would have known him better, but he was wrong, it seemed that Valentine plan had succeeded.

“What was your price?” Valentine asked.

“I posed as Isabelle, and the daylighter came by, and he kissed me, can you believe it?” Sebastian replied, and noticed that their prisoner was smiling at him.

“You kissed… a… vampire?” Alec asked, grinning at him, for a moment he did not mind the pain, the burning pain, this was at least something worthwhile to hear about.


	6. Chapter 6

**On Valentine’s ship**

Alec Lightwood was lying face down on the floor, he was hungry, in pain and was feeling quite defeated after the whole torture number that Sebastian and Valentine did on him.

He was sure his ribs were broken as he had hard time breathing, not to mention the Agony rune has been used a lot on him, the lack of food and water not making things better either, and Alec felt drained, with no power to do anything as every breath he took caused him to gasp for air.

Alec knew that he failed, and no one will come looking for him, they already got the _best version of him_, he saw it in the video that Sebastian recorded on his phone, his siblings and even Magnus. In this fight, he knew that Valentine won,

Alec didn’t know how much he could keep holding himself from falling apart, besides he believed in the parabatai rune, but it seemed useless as Valentine might have done something to it, because he couldn’t hear his brother’s thoughts or concerns through the bond.

Maybe he was the weaker of them all, and that’s why Valentine and Sebastian took him in the first place, either way, he knew that both sides will be happy to see him dead, after all, his siblings and his boyfriend did not seem to have noticed.

Yes, Valentine certainly won in this fight, and Alec knew if there was a war or an attempt to kill Valentine, he would be killed in the crossfire, after all who will believe him to be him as they have got the best version of himself, he will not be missed at all.

* * *

**At Magnus’s loft**

Magnus kept his eyes on his boyfriend, fearing that he might do another vanishing act and he will be missing him forever, no matter that Jace was there with him as well.

“Don’t worry, Magnus, he won’t leave us again,” Jace tried to assure the warlock, as he found that he has no air all of sudden and knelt on the floor, he could feel his eyes becoming wet and he could barely look straight as his vision blurred, “I can’t breathe.”

“What do you mean, you can’t breathe?” Magnus asked him as he was on his side, and the warlock stared at the parabatai rune.

“I don’t know, but there’s something wrong with this rune, because Alec is right here and very happy.” Jace replied, felt more calmly as he could see that the warlock used the magic on him to help him breathe.

“Thank you.” Jace thanked him as his breath calmed down, and he could see more clearly.

“Where did your brother go?” Magnus asked as he looked around and Alec wasn’t there.

Both hurried to leave the room, only to see Alec smiling at them and asked, “I was hungry, do you want some pancakes?”

“But we just ate about an hour ago…” Magnus teased with a smile on his face.

“I wouldn’t mind a pancake myself.” Jace told his brother and sat, as his brother set the table, and put the biggest plate that he could find filled with the pancakes in the middle of the table, so they could all enjoy it.

Magnus sat beside his boyfriend, as they both enjoyed feeding each other although Jace kept giving them annoyed looks.

After they finished eating, Magnus waved his hand, and everything was tidy and the kitchen was cleaned.

Jace collapsed to the floor, he could feel his whole chest was on fire, and he couldn’t breathe.

“Jace, are you all right brother?” Alec knelt beside him and tried to comfort him.

Jace gave his brother a strange look, he really didn’t know what the problem with the parabatai rune was, it never happened before, and this quite puzzled him.

“I don’t know, Alec, do you have any pain?” Jace asked his brother.

“No, I’m fine.” Alec replied to him.

“Magnus, heal me, I can’t take the pain much longer, I can feel the pain, but I can’t see anything, I think that there’s something terribly wrong with the parabatai rune.” Jace explained, as he held his side, the pain and the loss of air weighted heavily on him.

“That bad, huh? Where is your stele?” Magnus asked, not used to seeing the blonde shadowhunter asking for him help.

Jace removed his stele, and with shaking hands, he tried to move it to draw the iratze rune, once he did so, he laid on the floor on his back, sighing with relief when he could breathe normally.

“Are you all good now? Or should I call Izzy?” Magnus asked the blonde shadowhunter, and then he turned to see where he’s boyfriend gone to.

“Alexander, are you all right? Are you having any pain?” Magnus asked with concern.

“I’m fine, Magnus, I don’t have any pain at all.” Alec replied to his boyfriend.

“That’s very strange, Jace, I think that you should ask the silent brother for advice or maybe try the clave, because there’s something wrong in here.” Magnus suggested to him.

“You are right, I think that I will do just that, I don’t this sort of thing to happen in the middle of a demon fight.” Jace agreed.

* * *

**Valentine’s ship**

Alec was tired, drained, in pain, defeated, he just wished that his ordeal was over, the shadowhunter already accepted his fate, he knew that he couldn’t get back to the institute any longer, they had a clone that looked just like him, and his siblings and Magnus loved this clone more than they ever did the original, he was better off dead.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is AU. More to come, and aim to finish the story.

**Two months later at Magnus’s loft**

The war was around the corner, everyone was going to fight against Valentine and his son. Magnus kept his boyfriend close, not wishing for him to vanish again, the downworlders and the shadowhunters would unite for this fight.

“So, how is this going to work, again?” Magnus asked as he wanted to know what the plan is.

Jace sighed and he hoped that the warlocks could cooperate and aid them.

“Well, I’ve been thinking that the warlocks could open portals so we can fight Valentine and his son on the ship, so they have nowhere to go, and we could free all the downworlders that he might have caught.” Jace told him the plan.

“It might work, I will need to talk with the warlocks about it,” Magnus agreed and then he added, “Maybe we should do it at night, so the vampires and the werewolves can join in the fight, I suppose that they want their pack members back in case Valentine was the one who caught them in the first place.”

Jace looked at him and asked for an update, “Let me know how the talk with the other warlocks went so I’ll send Simon to speak with the Santiago clan, and Clary will do the talking with Luke’s clan so we all be on the same page.”

“Agreed.” Magnus nodded to him as Jace walked toward his parabatai who was not so much involved in the talk.

“Alec, are you, all right?” Jace asked.

“I’m fine.” Alec replied.

“He still has bad memories from when he was on the ship and he is not ready for the fight or to deal with it.” Magnus said as he noticed the grim face on the blonde shadowhunter.

“Alec, it is all right,” Magnus held him closer, and elaborated, “He has nightmares, but he won’t tell me about them.”

“I do not know what to do anymore,” Jace told him and added, “I can feel him slipping under the rune, like one minute I can see him, and the other minute he is under a cloud, and I really don’t know what do anymore, I still want to keep him, the parabatai rune, because I don’t know what I will do without him, he is my parabatai, my brother, all I want is to keep him close. I don’t want to lose him again, and still we are the best shadowhunter pair as we fight together in great sync.”

“I know, we all keep him close when we land on the ship, and we leave no one behind.” Magnus assured to him.

Jace’s phone and stele were on the table as the light and ring came from his phone, he noticed that it was Izzy, “Izzy, how are you?”

_“I’m all right, but our parents want you and Alec back at the institute at once, it is about the plan to attack the ship, they do not seem pleased at all.”_

“Can you tell what is it about? We certainly can’t back away; they need to see the point for attacking Valentine.” Jace argued, he did not want to go back to the institute right now, something certainly did not smell right.

_“There is nothing that I can do, but maybe I can convince them this plan is sound if we can catch Valentine and his son, they may join the fight or wait for our return, I’ll try and let you know.”_

“Thanks Izzy, if we can bring everyone together for this, we may attack next week or this week, but we need to be in sync.” Jace told her and closed the phone.

* * *

**On Valentine ship at the same time**

“It seems that they like the clone version better, even a warlock cannot tell the difference.” Valentine snarled with a smile over the beaten shadowhunter.

“And I thought that the warlocks were smart enough to see the difference.” Jonathan added to his father while kicking Alec with no mercy in his eyes.

Alec lay on the ground, his body colored in black and blue, some of the blood was dry and some was new, Alec gave up any hope that he will be found.

Valentine might be right in this, maybe they preferred the clone to him.

Alec did not know how much time has passed since he was kidnapped by Valentine, but it did not seem to matter anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, more to come.


End file.
